May 2011
1 post
“Hey, that’s a really nice bag…Canal Street?”
that’s as witty as I get. be jealous.
February 2010
1 post
a yellow cardigan?
I hate today.
January 2010
1 post
I just had another candy cane. I can’t stop.
December 2009
1 post
November 2009
4 posts
How does one deal with an asshole boss?
I just don’t care anymore.
I’ll be at Hollywood Tan if you need me.
looking chubby in a chunky sweater!
yee-haw.
July 2009
3 posts
my vegatarian chili is too hot to eat right now.
Life is unfair.
I’ve always tried to be open to everyone’s music interests but some people just have bad taste.
June 2009
1 post
“Everyone looks retarded once you’ve set your mind to it.”
– David Sedaris (via molls)
May 2009
1 post
December 2008
2 posts
a day at the Queens Center Mall is heaven.
It’s still fucking raining.
November 2008
8 posts
I hope I finally get a pony for Christmas this year
When someone says, “That just made me LOL”, do they really laugh out loud or am I just full of hate?
I’m taking this shit to go
If anyone asks...I'm the one who threw away the...
but I left a pot for mac and cheese.
it's really only 5pm?
Pink lipstick-check
Vodka mixed with leftover vitamin water/ginger ale-check
October 2008
6 posts
I dreamt last night that I had to take the Susquehanna Ferry to Washington to visit Nick McGlynn. I’ve never even met this guy and…who the hell dreams about the Susquehanna Ferry?
stop smiling at me
sloppy joe’s are on the way.
emily and I may or may not dress up for halloween. It all depends on her behavior.
“snack it to me”
me: you smell like thai
GIgs: it's not me I just got a whiff of it too
me: I hope that doens't make me love you
September 2008
22 posts
I'm eating a product from spain.
and force flex trash bags suck
“i have a crib you can have, in case you find that nice jewish boy you’re looking...”
– my mom (via cheddar)
the crib is spoken for
me: dont renig me
er
niger
its a fools paradise
Forrest: how come you never play ping pong with me
dear universe,
itsbedtime:
Am I bigger or are Chewy s’mores granola bars smaller?
Love, molls
I don’t have an opinion on this, but I was this close to using anumber 2 pencil today.
march of dimes
emily: incognito
me: that doesn't mean shit
EMily: justify my love
Me: for who?
emily: jesse jackson
me: I should have guesed, marzipan
“hunk of cheese”
– the young lady
japan
cheddar:
i think i had an aha moment, or series of moments rather. yeah, i’m pretty happy about things.
I can fix that.
“your muffin top just brushed my muffin top”
– emily to me, before we went into godiva
Please stop looking at my knockers
EMILY.
I can’t find my glasses.
Emily Elliott can suck it.
morsels
I loved my haircut on day 1 and day 2; but now whenever I see a woman over the age of 60 with short hair I feel the back of my head and hate everyone.
I miss tanlines and beer on the beach.
my topless roommate →
(via cheddar)
EX roommate, god Emily.
worth your time
a shower and pajamas never felt so much like heaven.
“I slipped and had a donut today.”
– annonymous
